RKF is the black metal jackass in charge of this ezine. When he's not making a fool of himself in public here, he makes a fool of himself in the noise / black metal band Korperschwache. He is formerly the guitarist for Autodidact and a bunch of other bands you never heard of. He is currently hiding in the bushes in Texas, waiting to pee on your leg. He also wants to pole Kate Dillon, not that this has anything to do with DEAD ANGEL. AMANDA is an enigma enshrouded in mystery and wrapped in darkness, sort of like J. R. "Bob" Dobbs, only with bigger breasts. She lives in a shack somewhere in the woods in Canada with a tribe of barely-domesticated panthers, a cistern full of gin, and a large double-barreled shotgun. She is not interested in "getting to know you better." She does, however, accept gifts in the form of toasty socks of an unusual nature. And money. And more bottles of gin. GAFNE ROSTOW is a bitter and dangerous escapee from the original Norwegian "Inner Circle" whose current location cannot be revealed in the interests of national security. He "rewards" those who displease him with fire, death, and dismemberment. The FBI and Interpol refuse to confirm or deny the rumor that he once responded to a passing fool who dared to mock his corpsepaint and many upside-down crosses by cutting the man's head off and posting it on a stick in his front yard. We run his reviews unedited because we are frankly fucking afraid of him. We deeply fear his great and terrible wrath. NEDDAL AYAD is a cranky bastard from the frozen wastes of Canada who plays scorched-earth guitar for the does and knife, please. He has survived fifteen-foot snowdrifts, opening for bad metal bands, and the unfortunate explosion that levelled the Hellfortress Beneath the Ice, so you'd best not even think about getting lippy with him. He enjoys relaxing by setting mimes on fire and directing loud, profane tirades at people who piss him off, which is just about everybody. DILLON TULK is DEAD ANGEL'S Youth of America intern, keepin' it young and keepin' it real. As in real noisy. He's baaaad, man, bad like Shaft but paler and without the sharp threads (how do you think he affords all those obscure cassettes?), so you best not test him! Fortunately, he'd rather love than fight... especially if cute girls are around. When he's not reviewing stuff you never heard of for this ezine or complicating his life, he performs in FERVEUR NOIRE, ASKELA, and other bands. THE DEVIL KITTY is our mascot, demonic fountain of wisdom, and diabolical force of evil who protects us from the rest of the world. Fear him, or else he will heave on you. Then eat you. Then burp.

FINALLY, AT LAST, THE ISSUE: The holidays were full of the usual angst, plus a really unpleasant virus that turned my PC into a useless pile of shit. (Well, not totally, but close enough.) This unfortunate situation -- which still hasn't be fully resolved, although I sincerely hope it will be shortly now that the issue is finished and I can turn my attention to other matters -- has resulted in all sorts of irritating delays and obstacles, not the least of which is that I've had to piece the issue together on my girlfriend's laptop, a fate worse than death. To the hacker who fucked up my PC, all I can say is that you better hope I never find you in a country that sells hacksaws and icepicks. COMING UP IN THE NEXT ISSUE: There's so much swell stuff flowing through the pipeline (and so many reviewers mysteriously AWOL at the moment) that the next issue is shaping up to be a big one. Here's what has already arrived and is scheduled for review: Aemae -- MAW [Isounderscore] Barkley's Barnyard Critters -- MYSTERY TAIL [Load Records] Bastard Noise / Government Alpha -- RESURRECTION [Housepig Records] Battlelore -- EVERNIGHT [Napalm Records] Bjerga / Iversen -- COSMIC SURGERY [Housepig Records] Celestia -- APPARITIA: SUMPTUOUS SPECTRE [Paragon Records] Edenbridge -- THE GRAND DESIGN [Napalm Records] Eddie the Rat -- ONCE AROUND THE BUTTERFLY BUSH [Edgetone Records] Elis -- DARK CLOUDS IN A PERFECT SKY [Napalm Records] Elis -- GRIEFSHIRE [Napalm Records] Fairyland -- THE FALL OF AN EMPIRE [Napalm Records] Furze -- UTD [Candlelight] Hinds / Palmer / Stagner -- A.S.A.P. WINGS [Solponticello] Lost Eden -- CYCLE REPEATS [Candlelight] Nonhorse -- HARAAM, CIRCLE OF FLAME [Release the Bats] Onslaught -- KILLING PEACE [Candlelight] Orthodox -- GRAN PODER [Southern Lord] Princess Ugly -- WE KNEW IT WAS PERFECT [Emergent] Pulse Emitter -- PLANETARY TORTURE [Housepig Records] Sinamore -- A NEW DAY [Napalm Records] Striborg -- NEFARIA [Southern Lord] Trail of Tears -- EXISTENTIA [Napalm Records] Trees Community -- THE CHRIST TREE [Hand/Eye] Twentyagon -- LUIGI [Worldeater] v/a -- FUN FROM NONE: LIVE AT THE NO FUN FESTIVAL 2004 & 2005 [Load Records] v/a -- MORIBUND DEATH CULT VOL. # 1 [Moribund Records] Jack Wright -- AS IS [Spring Garden Music] Robert Ziino -- ECLIPSE UNMASKED [???] The sharp-eyed will note that a couple of these have been on the list for a couple of issues now. Heh. The plan (which was originally scheduled for this issue, until the cosmos and my schedule were knocked out of alignment by the whole business of dealing with my blown PC) is to review everything in the queue, right up to the deadline. We'll see if I'm better at achieving my goals than, say, the current ostrich in charge of my toilet-bound country. HAH! FEED THE DEVIL KITTY'S STEREO: In the meantime, the address to send listenables remains (for the moment, anyway): RKF P.O. BOX 2434 AUSTIN, TX 78768 USA THE ROLL CALL OF THE DEVIL KITTY STILL EXISTS: Yes, it is still possible to secure a place for all eternity in the Devil Kitty's good graces; The Roll Call of the Devil Kitty is still accepting donations. Did you know that you can buy a safe haven for your soul, and remain uneaten in the coming nightmarish apocalypse that will afterwards be known as Ragnarok, or The Great and Terrible Feast of the Heaving Devil Kitty? It's true! If you were ever inclined to demonstrate your love for DEAD ANGEL and save your eternally damned soul in the process, now would be an excellent time to do it. Note that I am still committed to running a totally ad-free site and insuring that the ezine remains completely free of charge, which means I'm not making any $$$ from this, so any financial support that comes my way through the Roll Call of the Devil Kitty is always greatly appreciated. -- RKF 11/18/06